So, the word of the year for me is CONTINUE (see here), and time for a “we made it 22 days into the year” update.
- CONTINUING the writing- probably not as much time spent on this as I could (Squirrel!), but I decided to tackle this year’s “book” completely differently than last years, which was done on pure adrenaline, instinct, and emotion. I mean sure when I went back to edit I used thought, but the actual writing was a 6 week manic phase of just getting everything down on a page… and a shit ton of crying. This year’s project will take a lot longer as I’m plotting it out. I did a few “from the gut” scenes in November and December and now I’m working on making it a cohesive story… and since it’s a fantasy world, I get to create more than just the actual story… it’s a whole world of my very own!
- CONTINUING other creative pursuits. I picked up the needles again (thanks, KATE R!). I’m keeping my hands busy while bingeing (hello, new anime convert Sam) rather than always spending time refreshing Twitter and Facebook. So right now a Woman of Wonders is in progress and a some other basic knitting projects.
- CONTINUING taking care of me. I’m coming out of the mental health closet more. I am in therapy… and there is nothing fucking wrong with saying it or wrong with me for doing it. I have a brain disease that needs care of professional. After 30 years of fog it’s nice to see things a little clearer. It’s going to be a long journey to be totally clear, and I doubt I ever will be, BUT knowing that there is a demon inside of me that lies to me about almost all of my thoughts helps.
- CONTINUING to BE me. Sure I cut off all my hair and haven’t dyed it in over 3 months… but that’s just to get it all ready for wild spring and summer colorings. I spent a good 15-20 denying who I was, and I’m just done. I’m realizing that all that time I spent trying to be someone I wasn’t just so I could “fit in” with people I have nothing in common with and really didn’t ever enjoy spending time with (if you’re reading this I’m NOT talking about you!) was hurting more than just me (see above). So Sam is going to still be Sam this year. She of hair colors, unfashionable clothing, nerdly fandoms, D&D, and (fingers crossed) multiple tattoos.